Welcome! We have reached another week and are 2.5 weeks out from COMEDY FESTIVAL. Can you believe it? I’ve still been adjusting to the pace of life returning and now we are about to go super saiyan with it. I’m currently telling myself that I will somehow manage to write at least one incredible new joke before it all kicks off while also having one week off so that I can start the run full rested and at my absolute peak. Unlikely that either will be achieved.
Anyway, welcome to I shaved my legs for…THIS?! This is the newsletter that explores the theory that shaving your legs or putting in that bit of extra effort should translate to having an above-average day. To test this theory I (semi) critically review every shave and the subsequent day/week/experiences and give it all a rating out of 100. Any day that scores higher than a 75 was definitely worth the shave.
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The Shave
Had a shave after a session with my PT and I think I waited too long so all the endorphins had worn off and I had full-on JELLY legs. Not the first time this has happened, when I first started working out at uni I once went to a ‘Tone with Todd’ class and did so many squats that when I went to the movies with my boyfriend afterwards (worked at Palace cinemas - had free tickets - I date for the perks) he had to carry me down the stairs. This time though I was stuck on the floor of the shower with perfectly shaved legs, thinking I might never be able to get up. Eventually, I managed to put all my weight on the bath tap and gracelessly haul myself up, before realising I had a near-perfect shave - no nicks, no cuts, no hairy patches. Nothing short of perfection.
Rating: 20/20 turns out I was ready for this jelly, suck on that Destiny’s Child.
The Content
Ugh, we had International Women’s Day this week and it was full of all the old classics - breakfasts with speakers telling you to ‘make sure you ask for a pay rise’ and a grid of disembodied heads that might as well be titled ‘we can’t be sexist, look at our girls’. Luckily the latter move was dogged by the rise of this Gender Pay Gap Bot on Twitter.
I often struggle with the fact that all of this content is focused on this ideal of a model corporate woman (neat, tidy, career-focused and family-focused but not to the detriment of work) and the old ‘she CAN have it all’ mentality, that in my experience has lead to nothing but burn out. Maybe I am just against this because I have always looked unkempt in the office, crack jokes in meetings and despise working at cheap rates for someone less intelligent than I am so they can take all the credit. Also, I hate working (unless it’s on what I want), which may be part of the problem.
It would be great if we could start to accept that there are different types of women in the world who want different things that would be great. And what I want is to get rid of the idea that it’s women that conform to the existing standards that will be able to solve all our problems.
Rating: 10/20 make men go to the Women’s day breakfast while we get to stay home and have a well-earned rest.
The Food
Call me a contrarian, but now a picnic isn’t our only opportunity to be outside I am into them again. And by a picnic, I exclusively mean fish and chips with my boyfriend in the park near my house. This is something we do almost exclusively to people watch, and this time we started playing a new game called ‘Greek Tragedy. This is where we apply a complex matrix of Alpha/Beta pairing and reaching/settling to determine whether this couple being together is a tragedy or not.
I also like to ask ‘do you think they are happy?’ anytime someone is walking towards us and looking clearly miserable. Fingers crossed it’s just a bad day for them.
Rating: 20/20 there is nothing like judging people when your fingers are covered in grease and chicken salt.
The Social Stuff
I have not done anything socially. I know this is bad, and I would enjoy it once I get there, but everything else is taking up 100% of my energy. I wish I was the sort of person that was able to catch up with a friend and simply do nothing together…Except most of the time, I just want to do exactly the nothing that I am in the mood for and not a compromised ‘nothing’ that feels a lot like doing something. Or maybe it just takes a long time to feel comfortable not ‘turning on’ for a friend. Anyway, if someone is interested in going to see J Lo in Marry Me at a moment’s notice when the mood hits me, then let me know.
Rating: 0/20 the worst type of people are actually high maintenance people that know they are high maintenance (me), sorry Harry.
The Miscellaneous Stuff
Love these apartments, how do people make such nice apartments for themselves?
An interview in Time Out with yours truly.
Do you sleep better if you sleep wherever your cat sleeps?
Fun new series with Priya Krishna - loved this one on running a tik tok famous bodega ( I really love the word bodega).
Including this day in the life of an internet it-girl for the “I think it’s very sensual to be grubby” vibes.
Loved this article on hard work and over work.
Absolutely would go to this heartbreak hotel (and try not to think about The Lobster)
Rating: 15/20 good links are good.
Final Rating (65/100)
Okay, so not worth it again. I’m starting to think I was right when I used to go out without shaving my legs or maintaining any other bits to give me a better chance of hooking up with someone. Even though that approach did not have the highest success rate in the world. Or maybe it just shows how the little things can make a big difference for the positive or the negative if you let them.
Thanks as always for reading this! If you enjoyed it, I would love it if you could click the button below and share it with a friend.
Also another reminder to buy tickets to Comedy Zone. I’m hosting every night, all the acts are amazing lil kooks and it will be a killer night out.
See you in two weeks for the last newsletter before Comedy Festival!