Hello Prudie Rudies! Another fortnight has passed and now we must again convene, I hope it is as joyous for you as it is for me. I am writing this from my bed, which is where I am at nearly all times if you don’t see me at a show. I live my life like the poor sickly kid from the secret garden before that annoying girl came and messed it all up with the garden bullshit.
Anyway, you are reading the latest edition of I shaved my legs for…THIS?! The newsletter explores my theory that shaving your legs or putting in that bit of extra effort should translate to having an above-average day. To test this theory I critically review every shave and the subsequent day/week/experiences and give it all a rating out of 100. Any day that scores higher than a 75 was definitely worth the shave.
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The Shave
One month ago, I was kicked out of my house as yet another tile fell from our crumbling shower and it was finally deemed that the repairs we had been putting off (as renters who didn’t want to be homeless) had to go ahead. This meant a month of going between Air BnBs with much better and more powerful showers than ours. Even now I am home, I am yet to recover from the reality of what good water pressure feels like.
I did pop in a shave in the new shower to enjoy one of Melbournes’ gorgeous sunny mornings before days of rain/arctic wins. It was fine.
Rating: 8/20 points for finally having a detachable shower head, without the water pressure power to put it to good use ;)
The Content
I have been busy creating my own content (please come see me in Perth!) or consuming content that I have already consumed a million times for comfort. The other day I watched Sleepless in Seattle twice in a row. It was just so good.
A few weeks ago I did use a flight to Sydney as my chance to watch ‘Good Luck to You, Leo Grande’. I did that thing where the movie is a little longer than the flight but you think oh well I will use some of this tarmac time to get a head start on this. Of course, those are the flights where the pilot really loves the sound of his own voice when doing announcements.
Unfortunately, we caught up a bit of time in the air, which left me hunched over the iPad in my seat watching the climax of a movie while the rest of the plane filed out around me. It was upsetting, to say the least, that for a movie about hiring a male escort, it had largely been dialogue-heavy and sex free…until those last fateful moments when every single person in the plane had to walk past in the five-minute sex fest montage because I’ll be dammed if I was going to have to rewatch the movie in a cinema. They are even more disgusting than planes right now.
Rating: 16/20 A triumph, an inspiration…my god I should be working
The Food
For my 30th birthday, I went to Attica, the price of which I have still not been able to admit to my mum. And yes, the experience of going was phenomenal, but I couldn't help but feel guilty the entire time about the bacon and egg McMuffin and two hashbrowns I had for my birthday breakfast in bed that morning.
I say this as a passionate love of both the highest of high-end and the lowest of low and a lot of the time I feel that these can both mostly hit the mark. But there is one exception, that was recently bought to my attention by Bronwyn Kuss (you should follow), who bought 6 hot, cinnamon, donut king donuts with her to a meeting.
These donuts blow the competition out of the fucking water. Inner city Melbourne wants you to think that their high-end, $10 donuts are what you want but they have only achieved that by driving all viable competition out to the suburbs. I know a part of you might think these donuts are only delicious when you have the joy of watching them be piped by a robot into a hot vat of oil. But I am pleased to confirm, they are in fact, just as delicious when you miss out on the show.
Rating: 20/20 Donut King is the highest high of the low lows.
The Social Stuff
The previously mentioned bathroom saga has dragged on, with a few tradies dropping in and out of our place over the last week or so to finish off jobs. Admittedly we forced ourselves back into the apartment after weeks of Air BnBs that always had something a little bit off and which you were not allowed to rate appropriately for their quality. I tried to rate one Air BnB that had no wi-fi, constantly beeping dehumidifiers and half the amenities listed at three stars and a warning popped up that said “did you feel unsafe?”. Absolute psychological slam dunk there. Now because I hadn’t felt unsafe but only mildly inconvenienced, I had to give them that extra star I was trying to withhold, otherwise I worried that big Air BnB would come down and punish the poor family whose house I was renting. Okay, actually it was some big corporate management company, but who can think logically in such circumstances?
Anyway back to the tradies in our house, we had a young plumber come in to fix a few issues that had popped up once the shower was fixed and while he was here I listened in on him taking a few calls in quick succession. “Hi Ma, I’m just at the Flemington house, will be heading to Moonee Ponds Next” and then “Hi Ma, still here for a few more hours”. He was barely out the door by the time I rushed out to my partner to talk about how cute it was that he kept having these nice calls with his mum while he was here. Only for my partner to say “I was listening too but I think he just works for Mark who did our shower?” Disappointing, but still a great way to spend 20 minutes.
Rating: 16/20 tradies can inconvenience me all day if they give me a lil something to spy on.
The Miscellaneous Stuff
As a Sned Head, I love Alice Sneddon’s Bad News (and this is all the new eps in one convenient location)
Truly questioning who I love enough to drop 2k on attending a wedding
An ode to being old and unmarried. Love Helen Garner, despite not yet having read one of her books… Will get to that.
The art of maintenance is disappearing. This one might only appeal to me as a public transport nerd.
Love seeing Emma Chamberlain on Hot Ones.
Rating: 15/20 nice lil things to waste your time with.
Final Rating (75/100)
I promise I didn’t rig that number being a bang on worth it day babyyyyyy! I had a really great time putting this together for you and not just because I was simultaneously watching a live stream of the Long March 5B rocket crash path after getting the Spikevax booster because I love to live life on the edge.
Hope all is good in your world, and if you enjoyed this and wanted to share it with a friend I would be eternally grateful. I have a lot of exciting things coming up and this would be a great place to keep up to date with them. I promise myself I’ll do a new tik tok or Instagram reel every other day and very rarely meet that self-imposed deadline. But this is the one I (nearly) always deliver!
And before you go, a reminder that Unfriended is on sale in Perth for FRINGEWORLD! It’s a show about friendship breakups and me trying to justify that they have never actually hurt me despite my dedicating a whole hour to the topic.
Doing Donuts with the Shaver
Oh my god, I'm having the exact same issue with shoes. Bought some size 9 sneakers online (in a brand I was SURE I bought them in previously) and they were too small. Got some slides the other day in a 10 but figured it was just the cut, but when I went to go into a store to try on sneakers but all the 9's were too small! What is going on!?
Great edition.