Welcome back! Feels like an age since I have last spoken to you. I’ve been sick, recovered, moved to a new Air BnB, hosted 4 more late-night storytelling shows and been to Sydney for a day - all while whining about how tired I am of course.
I’m dropping this newsletter early in case you are free to come to The Night Cap tonight. We have a promo code FINALWEEK for 2-4-1 tickets or you can message me for a free one if that works better! Our sales were going well the last two weeks but have since then dropped off a cliff! It’s a lovely show and a great way to end the night so I really think it’s worth coming to!
You are reading the latest edition of I shaved my legs for…THIS?! The newsletter explores my theory that shaving your legs or putting in that bit of extra effort should translate to having an above-average day. To test this theory I critically review every shave and the subsequent day/week/experiences and give it all a rating out of 100. Any day that scores higher than a 75 was definitely worth the shave.
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The Shave
Melbourne has been disappointing with its Brisbane-y humidity lately. So the tights have to come off and an impromptu mid-morning leg shave was required. I had been too lazy to find a razor when I had a shower the night before (controversial reveal that I am a night shower person), so instead did it while fully dressed, sitting on the edge of a bathtub. It actually felt quite wistful and like something out of a Jane Austen film. Probably one of the lesser adaptions seeing as I was shaving my legs with strawberry body wash from the Body Shop, but still oddly beautiful in its own way. I didn’t even get that itchy leg problem from when you shave your legs out of the shower and can’t get all the soap off properly.
Rating: 20/20 may we all romanticise our own lives and tedious personal grooming chores.
The Content
Today is a day where I come up against the classic problem of being perceived as a Swiftie by every algorithm despite just enjoying Taylor Swift a normal amount. I truly believe there is no happiness to be found in the research and investigation of what Taylor Swift *MEANS* in any of her lyrics. Maybe sometimes she does just feel that everyone is a sexy baby.
I guess everyone obsessed with Taylor Swift Cryptography are the exact same people that really excelled during high school English. I remember having to write an essay about the meaning and symbolism behind Catcher in the Rye and even then not being able to comprehend that there was anything deeper to it. Surely it’s all just stuff that sounds good when you pull it out of your ass in those final few days before a big deadline. I used to daydream about Salinger giving an interview and admitting none of it meant anything so I could finally rub it in my English teacher’s face. Maybe a field of rye is just a field of rye, y’know?
I did really enjoy this tik tok that was sure Taylor had committed a hit-and-run with Harry Styles and keeps writing songs about it. Quite convincing evidence indeed.
Rating: 10/20 I think this makes it pretty clear that I was a B student in English.
The Food
I specifically booked an Air BnB to stay in because it was close to Melbourne’s only Pastel De Nata exclusive cafe - Casa Nata. This was a huge mistake. Those little tarts are so delicious, I’m making two trips a day. You have to trust somewhere that only sells one item - perhaps that’s why I like ice cream stores so much. They know a good thing when they see one and don’t try and differentiate (we’ll just ignore Kenny Lover also up the road and their attempt at adding hot chips to the menu).
I will consume my weight in these tarts and I will be ecstatic to do it. I can only recommend that you do the same.
Rating: 20/20 Mi Casa Nata is mi casa nata. You’re going to have to get your own.
The Social Stuff
I hung out with a girl gang the other day. Pretty cool and exciting. First time for everything, huh? Can’t wait to see how long it lasts. I was desperately looking for friends that I could cajole into coming to my fringe show this weekend and it turns out everyone I know has moved away from Melbourne (or is otherwise uninterested in late-night comedy, even on a Saturday). Either that or they are comedians busy trying to get audiences in for their own fringe shows.
It’s probably my fault for spending so long at uni seeing as a notoriously transitory population resides there. That and not being able to work in a big corporate office that is ‘more like a family than a workplace’ without losing my mind and full-on reverting to a stroppy teenager. I wish I had been able to collect a big group of mates that did everything together but unfortunately, I was in a dud year at my high school and have been operating at a deficit for the rest of my life.
Rating: 20/20 love to be part of something, hate to think it won’t last.
The Miscellaneous Stuff
Always looking for ‘how to get out of a rut’ advice. I’m naturally pre-disposed to finding the rut.
Haven’t watched Bad Sisters yet but will always read about Sharon Horgan.
Really hoped this 'Coastal Grandma Retreat’ would feature more Grandmas!
I love nothing more than a burnout article.
Rating: 10/20 couldn’t find much else worthy of your time and attention this time!
Final Rating (80/100)
Thanks so much for reading this short, but hopefully sweet, edition of I shaved my legs for…THIS?!! A worth-it day despite the barely hidden pleas for audience members. It’s hard work this creative stuff. Particularly when you are the type to never ask for favours and thus never get asked in return to build up some sort of reciprocal benefits program.
On a brighter note, any prudes based in PERTH - my solo show is premiering at FRINGEWORLD next year and tickets are already on sale! It’s about friendship breakups and why we should pay more attention to them (either that or just ditch friends altogether).
Thanks as always for reading! And if you like this newsletter I would love it if you could share it with a friend (and bring them to a show this weekend).