The Far North Shaveland
I shaved my legs for...THIS?!? Newsletter #43
Regular programming has returned! Have you missed me? I am writing this from the Whitsunday’s where I have had a few days off in the middle of a Queensland tour with the Melbourne Comedy Festival Roadshow. I will be heading home by the time you read this but swapping my togs and tevas from a woolly jumper and boots and doing a few more weeks around Victoria if any of the shows are coming to a theatre near you! The shows have been really fun and it’s nice to feel like I am away for ‘work’, as a real comedian. And of course, if you would like to believe that being away for work as a comedian is a laugh a minute then I am happy for you to buy into that fantasy.
Anyway, we are going to speed through this copy of I shaved my legs for…THIS?! The newsletter explores my theory that shaving your legs or putting in that bit of extra effort should translate to having an above-average day. To test this theory I critically review every shave and the subsequent day/week/experiences and give it all a rating out of 100. Any day that scores higher than a 75 was definitely worth the shave.
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Forgot my razor when travelling again, I have packed almost an entire pharmacy and had a fresh delivery from dollar shave club and still managed to forget a razor. A critical mistake when travelling to the hottest parts of Australia and near exclusively hotels with pools. I purchased some disposable ones from Woolies in a move that has proved to me that I love a trip to the grocery store even when travelling in the same country that I live in and with little to no chance of exciting new products. Anyway, the razors I went for were so bad and like you can’t feel if they are really achieving anything. It felt like I was shaving my legs but from a different room. How can something so ineffectual also cause such brutal cuts?
Rating: 7/20 If I could go back and tell teenage Prue one thing it would be to get rid of the disposable razors now and never look back.
We ended up staying for three nights in a hotel with no in room Wi-Fi, which at the very least should be classified as bad karma if not fully illegal in the year 2022. I am writing this while hotspotting off my phone like an actual peasant woman. Next you’ll catch me scrubbing my delicates over the bathtub while humming a little folk ditty. I even went as far as to buy a hard copy delicious magazine to help entertain me without chewing through my data too excessively. This was also a mistake because hard copy magazines are boring little advertisements that should remain limited to their sole remaining domain off the dentist waiting room. They had a whole spread dedicated to the tik tok feta and tomato pasta that had a viral moment MONTHS ago. Why do I need to pay to have old internet printed out?
Rating: 7/20 points added because I ended up streaming The Age of Adeline off my phone.
It is near impossible for me to go out for breakfast and not order some variation of the bacon and eggs. No matter where you are, you know it will deliver you enough food to get you through until at the very least an early dinner. There is something about it that feels like ‘this is travel’. I’m treating myself but in quite a sensible way. If there is anything Australia is truly lacking it is a proper diner culture. I want cheap bacon and eggs and refillable coffee from a drip coffee maker every morning for the rest of my life. Toast that you can keep coming. Hundreds of variations on a breakfast potato. Unfussy service with a goddamn smile. The ultimate version of this is of course Beauty’s in Montreal. You know a concept is good when it must carry its own merch. One day I hope to have a home and closet full of diner branded goodies. That’s when I will know real progress has been made.
Rating: 16/20 bringing the diner to Australia will be my life’s work.
The Social Stuff
I’ve spent roughly a week with the same group of touring comedians/tour managers/stage managers and I have learnt that I have absolutely no interests and cannot contribute to the sheer volume of conversation required. My chat is simply not good and I am willing to embrace that. Is it a by-product of the lockdowns? Maybe. Or am I just no longer interested in my own ‘getting to know someone’ anecdotes? Probably more the latter. Sometimes it really feels like, why have a conversation when podcasts exist and we can listen to a carefully edited and researched version of the thing we are trying to attempt? I can give one good anecdote/conversation starter a day and then I feel fully entitled to clock out.
Rating: 10/20 this does not bode well for a future career in radio despite me loving the idea of that as a steady income stream.
The Miscellaneous Stuff
‘Coastal chic grandma’ has always been in where I am concerned.
Obsessed with how minimalist this in home gym is.
Is it crazy to want these pants?
Rating: 10/20 haven’t had much time to browse, sorry team!
Final Rating (50/100)
Okay, the shave was bad and everything else suffered. Maybe there is something to this whole premise after all. Or maybe I am just over-tired and feeling cutthroat with my ratings. Both are very real possibilities.
Either way, we are back on the fortnightly schedule and for that, I hope we are all relieved. If you like the newsletter please give it a share or tell a friend. As always I would love as many prudes as possible to be reading this. I promise better scores are on the way once I finally recover from Comedy Festival and then leaving for Far North Queensland almost straight away.